So Syndergaard got ejected for throwing behind Utley’s back and Lackey doesn’t even get a warning for throwing at Matz’s head? While he’s squaring to bunt? Ummm, can we get the fucking robot umps already?! What a joke.

Matz responded by:

1) flying out to the track, which raised some eyebrows, I suppose.

2) letting up a home run to the next batter he faced–oops.

3) cheering when Cespedes launched a ball to the moon and then trotted at Tolo-speed.

So maybe Lackey woke the Mets up? We were deeeeeead. We were down 2-0 after two batters and I thought the game was over. Matz settled in, Nimmo had his coming out party with a clutch hit (what the fuck is a clutch hit?), and Familia dodged bullets to get the save. He walked a guy and then let up a double (on an 0-2 pitch!!) to Zobrist. Nimmo misplayed the ball in RF but the Cubs opted to hold runners at 2nd & 3rd with nobody out. That was retarded. It was a pinch runner! Oops. That guy could’ve scored and tied the game up, no question.

Zobrist plays every single position better than anyone on our team. When Lagares comes back, an argument can be made. 

Asdrubal wore a Cespedes sleeve. He made a yuge play, too. Stick with the sleeve. 

Was Yo’s dinger the most colossal blast ever? Biggest bomb at Citi since the home run derby, I’d say. By anyone, not just him. What a BOMB. As usual, nobody was on base. I thought we’d just lose 3-1 but this was quite the gift win. We just own the Cubs, huh? Eh, we owned the Nats last year, too. Not sure it carries over. 

Also for my birthday, the Mets pay Bobby Bo today!! What a delightful birthday reminder from the Mets that I root for the worst organization ever. 

Mets 5, Cubs 2

  
Don’t move. Don’t breathe. Don’t panic. Don’t blink.

Murph dinger? Check. Familia save? Check. deGrom win? Check. Cespedes mashing? Check. Some kind of horseshit keeping the game close? Check. Ivy check. But we’re 3-0. 1 away from the ship. Don’t breathe. 

I just want to point one thing out:

At the beginning of the season, people looked to two teams as the “hopefuls” or the “potentials” to take over a playoff spot from an incumbent. Those two teams were the Mets and the Cubs.

The Mets had the pitching. The Cubs had the hitting. People debated which team would be better. People debated which team actually had a shot. It made the Mets and Cubs into rivals, of sorts. If nothing else, it made the matchup between the two teams a litmus test and a proving grounds to see which team was actually legitimate; to see which team has actually blossomed in the offseason and was now ready to compete for something (unless you count competing for .500 a thing).

Their season series is now over. The Cubs won 7 games. The Mets won 0. The litmus test has revealed the Mets players as a bunch of basic bitches and the organization as acidic and corrosive slimeballs. Tip your cap to Theo Epstein–he’s quite the GM.

Well, we got swept (4 games) at Wrigley.

But we’re soooooo good at home, right? RIGHT!?

The Reds suck ass. The Cubs don’t. So we’ll see what happens. Murphy is back in the lineup, and immediately batting cleanup. No surprise there. A guy that can hit! He can hit a little bit! CLEANUP!

This series should be a nice display of their infield (Rizzo, Castro, Russell, Bryant) vs ours (a rotating cast of clowns, none of whom will be on the team next year other than Duda, who is slumping to shit).

We could’ve had Castro. Or Russell. But naaaaaah, we’ll go with Tejada and Soupman. YAAAY!