Postblow: Ah, Now That’s More Like It

Giants 3, Mets 0

Ah, yes, all is right in Metsland. We’re back on our historic pace of most times getting shut the fuck out.

Observations:

~I see Ruben Sangwich is back at the 2-hole. Awesome. Real embarrassment to 2-hitters everywhere. It makes me angry that I’m considering my adept-at-hitting brother for the 2-hole on our softball team. (His words: “Softball is different. There’s no bunting or stealing. And besides, we get the most at bats.”) True, true. Good to see Ruben getting all these ABs.

~All in on Cap’n Kirk? He’s batting a muscular .095 this season. Did the Angels just throw him in a dumpster? And that dumpster traveled to Vegas? Why is he back here? We rejected him, every other team in the league rejected him, and now we’ve seen some kind of x-factor and brought him back?

—The Perfect juxaposition, of course, is that Hunter Pence returned for SF today and played stellar defense and hit 2 guys in.

~”Cain looking very hittable…as long as you’re not the Mets.” -Ron Darling

~The Mets made run-costing errors in the field. Again, as I stated above, all is right again in Metsland.

~Grandy getting doubled up at home on a shallow foul out by Tejada. Nice play, Hunter Pence. Nicer play, Mets. Just spectacular. We keep outshitting ourselves. You’d think we would’ve run out of diapers by now.

~During the top of the 9th, I checked the score app on my phone to review some things. However, the game wasn’t on the home screen. It was listed as “past.” I had to go into the archives. They called the game. Just straight called it. Put it in the books. Mets down 3-0 in the 9th? Update that “9” to an “F” please thank you good job. I’m all for that. It really shoulda been called before it started. Matt Cain? Get the fuck outta here.

Postblow: 1-0 Shutout HAHAHAHAHA

Plop.
Plop.

Cubs 1, Mets 0

Boy, it’s a good thing we have all these aces, right? Hell, Niese isn’t even one of our aces! And he still only let up 1 run! Wow! What a staff! We’ve really got something in the works, here!

We are terrrrrrrible. Daniel Murphy comes back and Michael Cuddyer immediately goes down. Our lineup was at full strength for about 7 days at the beginning of the season. Since then, we’ve had at least two–even three–starters injured at all times. Not to mention Wheeler, Mejia, Edgin, Blevins, Black, etc.

The second the Cubs got their run, it was over. Completely over against a scrub pitcher with a 4.5 ERA. Pathetic. The Cubs only had 4 hits and 1 run. But we had 3 hits…and 0 runs. That kind of futility is impressive. Stop me if you’ve seen this scenario before…as in, practically every day.

We should just put Matz, Thor, deGrom, and Harvey in the lineup on their non-throwing days.

At least Niese pitched well enough to get dealt. Probably to the Cubs.

So Cuddyer went down. That was a lock. He’s been playing hurt all year (and for the past 5 years) anyway. Bring up Conforto!? Is it time? You know we’re too cheap and Jew-y to go out and get someone. Conforto! Nimmo! Hoooraaaay minor leaguers that are unprepared and will be ruined forever!

PREBLOW BONUS: Big Sexy on the bump tonight against Jon Lester. Lester has been shitty all year. Today is a perfect day for him to get back into form. If you play fantasy baseball, the LOCK STRATEGY is to just rotate your pitchers and start the guy that is facing the Mets every day.