A Cespedes for the Rest of Us

Yoenis Cespedes
Yoenis Cespedes

Craziest 48 hours in franchise history.

The Cubano has come.

The impact bat has come.

Hats off to Maverick. Giving up Fulmer and Cessa was big, but Cespedes is the man. It’s a great move. The Mets are the big winners of the deadline. I’d say the Astros were, but they’re not because of Gomez’s balky hip, of course.

Of course, I won’t believe it until Cespedes is in a Mets uniform.

I won’t complain. I won’t be out. But…now we gotta win this series. WE MUST. We’ve gotta show Cespedes that he’s on the right team. We have to make a real run.

Happy #HarveyDay

This picture would be perfect if there was rain.
This picture would be perfect if there was rain.

Harvey vs Gio tonight. We’re 3 games back. We can be tied for the division lead by the end of Sunday. HA! Haha haw haw haw haw.

The Mets are “talking with the Reds about Jay Bruce.” They’re mainly talking about how Bruce has hip issues. Also, the Mets want a reliever thrown in. Someone like Aroldis Chapman. No, wait, not Chapman. He has shoulder problems. His velocity is down to 103.

Happy #HarveyDay everyone!

I’m Done (Part 2)

Padres 8, Mets 7

Hey, let’s all get hyped up for the Nats! We got Gomez! Just gotta brush aside the Padres aaaaand…

Nope to both.

Legitimately the cruelest 24 hours in Mets history.

The Wilpons won’t be punished because the rich elites of the world live by different rules. The Jew fucking snake liars! Laughing and lying! Gomez went to the Astros. He’s completely fine. It’s all financial issues. Until they sell the team, I’m done.

And don’t get me started on the umpires cheating. They cheated. They stole that win from us. Calling a delay with 1 out left (and a strike on the hitter!) is the biggest load of horseshit I’ve ever seen since I saw the Mets talking about Gomez’s health report.

I’m done. I can’t talk about it anymore.

The Mets have until 4pm to get Jay Bruce or something or I’m done and we should all be done. We must boycott. We must kill baby Jeffy. We must do something. 

I’m Done (Part 1)

I’m done. We should all be done until the Wilpons are ousted. Full story coming soon, but I’m really done. This has been the craziest 24hrs ever and the only reason anyone would stick around is due to battered spouse syndrome. Don’t be a victim. Be done.

Part 2 coming soon. Too done to think right now. 

Mets Lose Game, Ace, and…HOLD THE PHONE!!

There's no crying in baseball!
There’s no crying in baseball!

Padres 7, Mets 3

Duda hit 3 solo dingers today. He only needed 5 more for the win!

Jesus fucking Christ what a whirlwind for Flores. My photo/caption is a little harsh, but I couldn’t resist quoting the great Jimmy Dugan (“avoid the clap”). The truth is that Flores is a gutsy player and we are all sad to see him go and the team handled that like shit–they were both unsympathetic and stupid for risking an injury–and we hope he does well and blah blah blah but the homecoming for Carlos Gomez is HUGE and…

NEVER FUCKING MIND!! Wheeler must have failed the physical. I guess he’s deeeeead.

It was a real win-win trade, too. The Mets would get Gomez, shut down Lagares, and by the time Lagares was healthy again, Gomez would be finishing up a contract year and we would get a 1st round pick for him (as long as we didn’t end up botching the qualifying offer). Also, by the time Wheeler will be healthy, we’ll have Fulmer up. It was looking good. Really good. Too good for this dogshit organization.

The Mets have ruined everything. Wheeler’s TJ was botched, most likely. Sandy should be humiliated. What a complete joke.

Maverick simply didn’t want Team Minaya back together. Change of heart what with Wheeler being his most prized possession.

TDA is supposedly coming back tomorrow. I wish we could say good riddance to Recker forever but knowing Travis, he’ll be on his 3rd injury by Sunday.

Most importantly: We’ve gotta win this series tomorrow. Let’s fucking go. Noon start. It’ll all be over soon.

Numb To It

I have become...comfortably numb.
I have become…comfortably numb.

Referring to Mejia’s suspension, manager Terry Collins said the Mets clubhouse was, at this point, “numb to it.” By “it,” he means, “bullshit that happens to our team.”

I couldn’t agree more. I’m numb to the bad breaks and the bullshit. I’m not numb to removing the Jewpons from office, but at this point it’s Murphy’s Law for Metsblow nation.

If we win this series and Nats series, then we’re good. If we lose, we’re bad. It’s that simple.

If Conforto gets hurt, I won’t be numb because he’s the savior. But I’m over everything else. I’m loooooong over losing Wright. He took fielding practice yesterday. La-dee-freakin-da.

There’s a 100% chance that Wheeler’s already missing at least half of next season. What’re the chances that Harvey, deGrom, Thor, and Matz all throw 30+ starts in 2016? 5%? 10% at most?


Thor Strikes With His Mighty Hammer


Mets 4, Padres 0

We scored 4 runs! IT’S A NEW DAY!!! We’re now 37-5 when scoring 4 runs. Holy freakin’ shit. And TDA is apparently ready to go. He’ll be back by Friday and dead on Sunday.

The big story from last night was Thor. He was perfect going into the 7th. He finished with a line of 8 IP, 0 R, 3 H, and 9 Ks. Holy balls.

Let’s win this fucking series.

Please Do NOT Get Rid of Mejia

Jenrry Mejia
Jenrry Mejia

Mejia has been suspended for 162 games for using PEDs. Baaaaallllin. So ballin. Juicing while on parole for juicing. So ballin. Of course, getting caught isn’t ballin.

Everyone is clamoring for his removal from the team.


It costs ZERO dollars if he gets banned. Wouldn’t you rather see if our elite closer can come back next season in a Mets uniform, rather than another one? It costs ZERO dollars if he gets caught.

The people calling for Mejia’s head are the same nutjobs that called for ARod’s. Uhhhh…soooo…how did keeping him work out for the Yankees? Fucking idiots. PEDs aren’t shit. Everyone’s on them. Who cares? Do you drink coffee before you go to your Wall Street job? That’s a PED. Do you smoke weed for rapping? That’s a PED. PEDs are awesome. The only real criminals in baseball were the people that didn’t play against black people. Those records should be asterisked the fuck up.

Keep Mejia. For the love of Gawd, keep Mejia.

P.S. Clippard looked real good last night.