What Form of METS Disease Will Cespedes Get?

A Cespedes for the Rest of Us

Yoenis Cespedes
Yoenis Cespedes

Craziest 48 hours in franchise history.

The Cubano has come.

The impact bat has come.

Hats off to Maverick. Giving up Fulmer and Cessa was big, but Cespedes is the man. It’s a great move. The Mets are the big winners of the deadline. I’d say the Astros were, but they’re not because of Gomez’s balky hip, of course.

Of course, I won’t believe it until Cespedes is in a Mets uniform.

I won’t complain. I won’t be out. But…now we gotta win this series. WE MUST. We’ve gotta show Cespedes that he’s on the right team. We have to make a real run.

Happy #HarveyDay

This picture would be perfect if there was rain.
This picture would be perfect if there was rain.

Harvey vs Gio tonight. We’re 3 games back. We can be tied for the division lead by the end of Sunday. HA! Haha haw haw haw haw.

The Mets are “talking with the Reds about Jay Bruce.” They’re mainly talking about how Bruce has hip issues. Also, the Mets want a reliever thrown in. Someone like Aroldis Chapman. No, wait, not Chapman. He has shoulder problems. His velocity is down to 103.

Happy #HarveyDay everyone!

I’m Done (Part 2)

Padres 8, Mets 7

Hey, let’s all get hyped up for the Nats! We got Gomez! Just gotta brush aside the Padres aaaaand…

Nope to both.

Legitimately the cruelest 24 hours in Mets history.

The Wilpons won’t be punished because the rich elites of the world live by different rules. The Jew fucking snake liars! Laughing and lying! Gomez went to the Astros. He’s completely fine. It’s all financial issues. Until they sell the team, I’m done.

And don’t get me started on the umpires cheating. They cheated. They stole that win from us. Calling a delay with 1 out left (and a strike on the hitter!) is the biggest load of horseshit I’ve ever seen since I saw the Mets talking about Gomez’s health report.

I’m done. I can’t talk about it anymore.

The Mets have until 4pm to get Jay Bruce or something or I’m done and we should all be done. We must boycott. We must kill baby Jeffy. We must do something. 

I’m Done (Part 1)

I’m done. We should all be done until the Wilpons are ousted. Full story coming soon, but I’m really done. This has been the craziest 24hrs ever and the only reason anyone would stick around is due to battered spouse syndrome. Don’t be a victim. Be done.

Part 2 coming soon. Too done to think right now. 

Mets Lose Game, Ace, and…HOLD THE PHONE!!

There's no crying in baseball!
There’s no crying in baseball!

Padres 7, Mets 3

Duda hit 3 solo dingers today. He only needed 5 more for the win!

Jesus fucking Christ what a whirlwind for Flores. My photo/caption is a little harsh, but I couldn’t resist quoting the great Jimmy Dugan (“avoid the clap”). The truth is that Flores is a gutsy player and we are all sad to see him go and the team handled that like shit–they were both unsympathetic and stupid for risking an injury–and we hope he does well and blah blah blah but the homecoming for Carlos Gomez is HUGE and…

NEVER FUCKING MIND!! Wheeler must have failed the physical. I guess he’s deeeeead.

It was a real win-win trade, too. The Mets would get Gomez, shut down Lagares, and by the time Lagares was healthy again, Gomez would be finishing up a contract year and we would get a 1st round pick for him (as long as we didn’t end up botching the qualifying offer). Also, by the time Wheeler will be healthy, we’ll have Fulmer up. It was looking good. Really good. Too good for this dogshit organization.

The Mets have ruined everything. Wheeler’s TJ was botched, most likely. Sandy should be humiliated. What a complete joke.

Maverick simply didn’t want Team Minaya back together. Change of heart what with Wheeler being his most prized possession.

TDA is supposedly coming back tomorrow. I wish we could say good riddance to Recker forever but knowing Travis, he’ll be on his 3rd injury by Sunday.

Most importantly: We’ve gotta win this series tomorrow. Let’s fucking go. Noon start. It’ll all be over soon.