Mets 14, Rockies 9

So what? Cespedes hit 3 dingers. 7 RBI. Whatever. It ain’t shit. Kirk hit 3 dingers IN QUEENS. Not this easy Colorado shit. Why pay Cespedes? Why bother? I say we pay Kirk and cut our losses with this guy. It’s not like Cespedes is the best hitter in franchise history. It’s not like he’s the impact bat we’ve desperately craved for 6 years. It’s not like he’s leading us to a division title or anything…

Meanwhile, Duda is dead. His back is out again. Our back specialist was just given a raise.

Os 5, Mets 4

Thor battled, but without going 7 and giving way to Clippard and Familia, we can’t win games. Our bullpen blows. Robles and Smallhat Torres (now the only Torres) couldn’t hold leads. Torres let up a walkoff dinger to a shrimpy ass dude. I’m not gonna sit here and tell you that I think Bighat is good, but fact is: Smallhat sucks, too. The bullpen sucks. The starters have to be elite for us to win. The bullpen has exploded since Bighat and Mejia left. Also, Cuddyer shouldn’t be out there. Cespedes probably makes that catch. Bullshit dinger in a bullshit stadium. Still, Torres should never be in during a tie game. We completely blew his arm out last year and the year before. Put Gee in the pen. Blevins said he is, “shooting for October.” Shooting like the shooting pain in his leg.

Lucas Duda was caught stealing in this game. Read that again.

Wilmer Flores hit a dinger and also signed autographs on photos of him crying in the dugout.

Where’s Reynolds, Herrera, and Rosario? And Nimmo and Greasy Cecchini? I’m sure we’ll hear about them more as the Mets start squirming out of resigning Cespedes. Herrera is in Vegas batting .350, which translates to about .100 in NY. Gotta bat about .600 in Vegas. All these guys get to the show and have under .300 OBPs. Maverick philosophy.

The Nationals LOST their half game opportunity. I had us penciled in for only 3 games up going into this weekened, but Scherzer got beat because the Nats couldn’t score in Colorado. NL LEEEEEEAAAASSST. I couldn’t care less. Cards had 83 regular season wins in 2006. It’s great. Win the fucking division. 4 games up. NATTITUDE! Such nattitude. It’s their division to lose, right Jayson Werthless? Spelling your name with a Y like a girl.

Span will come back at 100% and crush it. Wright will come back and have back spasms on the field.

Tonight, we start a 3 game series in Colorado. We’ve got Colon, Niese, and Verrett. We’re skipping Harvey’s start. I’m fine with it. Win ballgames. Protect the kid coming off of TJ. We’re not being cocky with a 4 game lead, we’re just being cautious and I like it. Save Harvey for the bigger games. This is to avoid shutting him down. Obviously, shutting him down would be the stupidest move in baseball history (cough cough Nationals Strasburg Nattitude cough cough), so if skipping 1 start leads to keeping him around the rest of the way, I’m fine with it.

Mets 5, Os 3

deGrom is so fucking elite. His ERA is now 1.98 on the season. And we got some insurance in the 8th. That didn’t matter, though, right? The 9th was nice and breezy? Nobody made a stupid play in the field? The bullpen didn’t almost blow it? Shheeeeiiiitt.

Well, we escaped. Now let’s get the mini-sweep. I exploded when Machado hit it to Murph to end the game. He’s a nightmare every play. Thankfully, he made it look easy…for a Mets infielder.

Pirates 5, Mets 3 (F/14)

The Pirates are better than us. Their bullpen is better. They don’t have blockheads like Murph throwing to the wrong base. They really don’t blow. We haven’t beat a good team yet this season. And don’t tell me the Nats. They blow. Beating them doesn’t mean we’re good. 

#HarveyDay tomorrow; hopefully we can avoid the sweep. 

Pirates 3, Mets 2 (F/10)

Parnell blows. I don’t really want to get into it. His ERA on the night was infinity (not an exaggeration). Where’s Black? Where’s Montero? Where’s Blevins? ALLLLLL DEEEEEAAAADD. Colon pitched very well. Cespedes went 3-5 with a dinger and a double. Don’t ever put Parnell in during a tight situation. REMINDER TO METSBLOW NATION: He’s always been bad. He used to throw 100mph and be bad. Now he throws 93 and is worse. He was mediocre at best a few years ago. Familia (and Mejia) are bar none the best we’ve ever had at closer. Franco, Benitez, Parnell…give me a break. Orosco’s glove is cursing out Parnell from the space station that it landed on.

Where’s Duda? Also dead. By the way, Ike Davis is tearing it the fuck up in Oakland. Don’t get me wrong, I’d much rather have an alive Duda, but he ain’t alive.

Today is the biggest game of the season. We’re currently 0-11 against the Cubs and Pirates. Uhhhhh…kinda gotta beat those teams.

Mets 12, Rockies 3

The only thing I really have to complain about is that MetsBlow is becoming difficult to write.

Thor started out blowing, but righted the ship. Great to see. Young dude without his best stuff, still battling, still managing to get by, and still learning. D-Wright taking his ham sandwich was the best move ever.

Ron Darling referred to Yoenis Cespedes as an “uh-oh hitter” which is basically saying that he’s an impact bat. Darling said that when he pitched, and there was an uh-oh hitter in the lineup, it messed with his concentration. A guy that can hit any pitch in any direction with pop. A guy that scares you. A guy that, even when making an out, makes you sweat. A guy that makes the whole lineup better by proxy and assimilation.

Everyone contributed today. Special day. Special sweep. Special team.

This weekend, the Pirates come to town. Another test, and we’ll have our back-end of the rotation going, but so will they. They’ll miss deGrom and Thor (and Matz due to injury). We’ll miss Cole and Liriano (and Burnett due to injury). We’ll still get Harvey going on Sunday. Let’s see Niese and Colon go to work.

Mets 3, Rockies 0

“The best pitcher in the game, hands down.” -Carlos Gonzalez on Jacob deGrom. Gonzalez is in the NL west, regular facing Greinke and Kershaw.

Another shutout. deGrom making another Cy Young worthy start. Yawn. Whatevs. Clippard in the 8th. Familia in the 9th. Just going through the motions.

Cespedes hit his first dinger as a Met. Nothing we didn’t see in the 2013 ASG or for his entire career. Just an oppo blast like it was nothing after getting chin music on the previous pitch.

And tomorrow Thor (our other OTHER OOOTHER ace) goes for the sweep. Snooze.

This team appears to be without hubris (at least right now). That’s great, because Metsblow Nation is going crazy. We’d been begging and begging for Cespedes, and we got him. We were willing to settle for Kang, Puig, really any impact bat. The Jewpons partially opened their Jew wallets and ONCE AGAIN our elite pitching wins with just enough hitting. We went from garbage doodoo hitting to having enough hitting. Wild swing. And thankfully the Nats BLOOOOW. They had the entire first half of the season to pull away and they didn’t because they blow. Now we’re good, and we’re looking to ADD TO OUR LEAD IN THE NL EAST. Wow. NL Least for sure.