Baby Jeffy Wilpon Cries About Money Spent

Metsblog writes: The Mets have spent more than $900 million on player salaries since their last playoff appearance in 2006.

WWAAAAAAAHHHH! WAAAAAAHHH!! Here comes the wambulance for Jeffy Wilpon. “We spent the munny! Too much munny! WAAAAHHH! No more munny! See we twied! We twied! We spent the munny! It doesn’t wok! No wok! Spend munny bad! Now no spend munny good! Waaaah!!

Fuck you. It’s not spending that’s wrong. It’s your complete ineptitude at how you spend it. Fuck your whole family. Fuck your silver spoon mouth, your delusions, and your mom.

Bobby Parnell’s Plans

Bobby Parnell plans to:

~pitch his guts out

~Get his bonus

~blow out his arm forever

They’ll never gift the job to Mejia, because young bull saves = mo’ $. Choooo. About 2mil more if he’s the full-time closer. 2 mil!? 2 MIL!!!?? Good god. The Wilpons have a vivarium to feed. He’s gotta STOMP IT OUT! all season to win the job.