How to Beat the Nats

Do I think the Mets will mop up the slop for two weeks and make the playoffs? Yeah, I actually do. If they don’t, fuck em, and if they do, fuck em anyway because this season was a joke. But yeah, I think we’ll take care of the trash in the basement.

But what a flat, shitty series that was in Washington. You wanna beat the Nats? You gotta bean Murphy. You wanna beat the Nats? Get mean. Get tough. We really acted like they’re already division champs. It’s OUR title to defend, you fucks. Talk about scared. We sooooo crowned them. Getting shutout in the rubber game just shaking in our sliding pants. Gross. Pathetic. 

Wake up, Mets. Start bullying these fuckboys around. They ain’t shit. Remember how you mowed them down? And the Cubs? You can’t play scared. You need the edge. 

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