Mets 6, D-Backs 2
Welp, this is our team. Ruben Tejada leading off. What a team. Our lineup got mowed down by Oliver Perez. Yes, THAT Oliver Perez.
But we won. We won because Matt Harvey returned to form. We won because AZ made some costly errors. We won because their pitching is fucking atrocious.
This matchup is baseball 101. The D-Backs have the BEST HITTING IN THE LEAGUE. They are 1st in runs, but Harvey held them down. A couple of solo dingers, but mostly unscathed. The D-Backs have HORRENDOUS PITCHING. They are the inverse Mets. And here we are in first place, and there they are below .500. That’s baseball 101.
If we had a mediocre offense–just MEDIOCRE–we’d be a 100 win team. We’re at or near the bottom in every fucking offensive category. Total runs, RBIs, hits, BA, OBP (the Maverick stat), sac flies, sac bunts*, team speed, it goes on…not to mention our defense sucks ass, too. Metsblow.
*Oh, dear God the bunting!! The next off day, the Mets should hire a specialist (Tom Glavine?) to come in, line the team up, and make them bunt for 18 hours straight. The fundies! The fundies!! Keith is crying.
Preblow for tonight: Jon Niese either rights the ship or gets replaced by Matz.