The New York Mets dramatically cut security staff at Citi Field in recent years despite concerns the moves would lead to increased response times for emergencies and fights as well as longer wait times at ticket gates, internal documents show. 

Well, first of all, fuck rent-a-cops and fuck regular cops and whatnot, but wow. I was not able to get stats on how many security guards they had in 2009 as compared to now. I was not able to get stats comparing their current security team to other stadiums and vfenues that hold roughly 40,000 people.

As Matt “Faggot” (Leo DiCaprio’s words, not mine!) Cerrone said, “real fans go to the game…and wait an hour to get in! And get mugged!”

This means two things: First, nobody is coming so we don’t need people to pat fans down. Second, when it comes to fan safety, the Wilpons are going with the Ivan Drago approach: If he dies, he dies.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Metsblow is the easiest gig in town because it WRITES ITSELF. I could hire an intern to copy & paste the articles from Metsblog, add “lol” at the end, and that would work perfectly every time.